About Me

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Delray Beach, FL, Westport, MA, United States
Undergraduate degree, Colby College; MA in teaching, Columbia Teacher's College; former high school English teacher in three states; former owner of interior design co. with advanced degree from R.I. School of Design. Published first book in 2009 titled, MINOR LEAGUE MOM: A MOTHER'S JOURNEY THROUGH THE RED SOX FARM TEAMS. Her humorous manuscript titled ELDERLY PARENTS WITH ALL THEIR MARBLES: A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE KIDS was published in June, 2014. In 2015 A SURVIVAL GUIDE won a gold medal in the self-help category at the Florida Authors & Publishers Association conference. See website By CLICKING HERE.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Pet Peeves

One of the women on my tennis team was recently called off the court during a match.  The message from the pro shop was to call home immediately.  Naturally, my teammate feared the worst, dropped her racket before her opponent could serve the ball, and sprinted to the pro shop.  The other ladies were concerned and waited for news upon her return.

"What happened?  Is someone going to the hospital?" they asked her.

"No!  It's been four days and my dog, Bitsy, finally pooped!


Which leads to my story................


Coronado, California, (also known as Coronado Island) is an affluent resort town 5.2 miles outside San Diego.  It is surrounded by San Diego Bay and the Pacific Ocean,  home to the famous Hotel Del Coronado, and training ground for the Navy Seals.  Recently, something new has appeared on the scene, and it's not dolphins.

It's dog poop!

On a blustery day in March, a resident friend of mine took her dog for a walk on the beach.  She was prepared with latex gloves and a supply of plastic bags.  The walk became a minefield.  "Hold on, Barney, I have to pick up another cow pile!  Oops, there's another one.  Come this way!"  At that point Barney, driven by power of suggestion, had to poop himself.   Kathie bent down seven times to clean up the messes.  I have an image of the Navy Seals resembling a caterpiller whose humps move up and down, as they jump in the air over the piles, carrying telephone poles on their shoulders.

By this time Kathie had used her supply of plastic bags, so she and Barney approached a 7-11 for more.  A customer relations nightmare sat on the sidewalk in front of the store - another pile.  Two of Barney's paws landed right in the middle. Kathie prevailed on a customer who had tried to step around her, holding his nose.  "Please, would you mind asking inside if they have an old rag?  It's unbelievable that owners don't clean up after their pets!"  We can only conclude the people of Coronado had never changed diapers.

Kathie, a dog walker for an Animal Control Facility, was fuming.  After Barney's clean-up and a new supply of bags, they headed for Vetter Park (a popular play-date area for local dogs).  There surely would be no piles there, since PAWS (Pet Animal Welfare Society) provided plastic bag dispensers about thirty-five paces apart.  "Unbelievable!  Here are more!"  What can we conclude at this point?  That the people of Coronado have never walked thirty-five paces?  Or worse - that they are just plain lazy?

Kathie had had enough!  She was determined to write a letter to the editor of the local paper.  She and Barney headed out of the park and up the street.  In front of  Sharp Coronado Hospital's emergency entrance, an ambulance careened in.  Kathy and Barney jumped up onto the curb into....you guessed it!

Kathie has had many responses to her "Who Are You People?" letter to the editor.  Among the most practical, I thought, was the suggestion she purchase a three-wheeler with a jumpseat for Barney.