About Me

My photo
Delray Beach, FL, Westport, MA, United States
Undergraduate degree, Colby College; MA in teaching, Columbia Teacher's College; former high school English teacher in three states; former owner of interior design co. with advanced degree from R.I. School of Design. Published first book in 2009 titled, MINOR LEAGUE MOM: A MOTHER'S JOURNEY THROUGH THE RED SOX FARM TEAMS. Her humorous manuscript titled ELDERLY PARENTS WITH ALL THEIR MARBLES: A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE KIDS was published in June, 2014. In 2015 A SURVIVAL GUIDE won a gold medal in the self-help category at the Florida Authors & Publishers Association conference. See website By CLICKING HERE.

Monday, January 25, 2016

The Difference between Boys and Girls (under age eight)




            BOYS                                                              GIRLS

  1. During a snowball fight, my round               1. During a snowball fight,
      plastic sled is a good Captain                          my round plastic sled is a
     America shield.                                               good place to pile up snowballs.
                                                                            

  2. A spatula or ruler is a good                         2.  A spatula is for lifting food, a
     sword. A dead branch                                      ruler is for measuring, and a
     is a good gun.                                                 dead stick goes in the fireplace.
                                                                          

  3. A peanut-butter-and-jelly                            3. A peanut-butter-and-jelly
    sandwich is a good snack before                     sandwich is too yucky to touch.
    lunch or dinner.

  4. A coffee table is a good place                     4. I’m not allowed to put my feet
     to jump onto the sofa.                                     or my drink or my paints on the
                                                                          coffee table

  5. A coffee table also makes a                         5. We’re not allowed to play near
    good wall for a fort.                                           the coffee table!

  6. If there’s no blood, I’m OK.                         6. If there’s blood, call 9-1-1.

  7. If I climb onto a chair and the                       7. No climbing in the house!
    dining room table, the chandelier
    makes a good trapeze.

  8. My backpack can hold bread                       8. My backpack holds my 
     and cheese for a week in my                            pencils and papers and lunch 
     fort.                                                                for school.

  9. Clothes are optional in the house.                  9. I love my polka-dotted tights 
                                                                             and tutu so much I want to 
                                                                             wear them to bed!

10. “Poop” and “fart” are the most                     10. “Poop” and “fart” are the most
      fun words my Dad says.                                   fun words my Dad says.

11. Dirt and sticks and a ball are                        11. Mom’s phone is my favorite toy.
      my favorite toys.


12. Bathrooms are supposed to smell.                12. I don’t go in the bathroom after
                                                                              my brother uses it.

13. If there's a towel, I don't need                       13. I sing “Happy Birthday” three 
      soap to wash my hands.                                     times while I wash my hands.

14. Pillow fights are the best!                              14. Don’t anyone touch my pillow!

15. Sheets make good ghost costumes                15. My brother won’t touch my 
      if you cut eye holes.                                            sheets because they have
                                                                               flowers on them.

16. My sister is scared of snakes.                        16. I hate my brother!

17. I don’t know how to clean up.                         17. I love to help Mama clean!

18. My sister is a tattle-tale!                                 18. My brother is always starting
                                                                                 trouble.

19. No, I don’t have to pee again.                        19. Grandma, I have to go to the
      I just went before we got to this place.                 bathroom again.

20. Grandma, here are two                                   20. Grandma, would you please 
      Spidey books to read.                                          read this Fancy Nancy book 
                                                                                to me? I love you
                                                                                very much, Grandma!

No comments:

Post a Comment