Our bus departed Whistler to go to Sun Peaks in the Canadian
Rockies. After a couple of hours travelling, the bus was positioned vertically
up the side of the mountain on a two-lane road when it pulled partly off onto a
shoulder. All of us passengers assumed it was for a photo-op, so we stood to
take photos. We looked all around but could only see blue sky ahead of us and
blue sky below us. Then we noticed our tour guide was crossing the road with
his cell phone at his ear.
We watched as he walked down the road, up the road, crossed
the street to our side, and then climbed the mountain. At that point we decided he probably wanted
some privacy to squat, but that didn’t make sense because there was a toilet in
the bus. Meanwhile, the driver crossed the street, walked down the road, walked
up the road, crossed the street back to our side, and then climbed the
mountain. Maybe they were having a rendez-vous?
Finally, our guide returned. “The bus has stopped by
itself!” he informed us. “It won’t restart!” There were shouts from some of the
older men and hysterics from their spouses. Needless to say, we weren’t near
any town and our guide didn’t know how long we’d have to wait. Unfortunately,
the bus had given out in a spot that partly obstructed one lane around a curve.
Some of the younger passengers were Australian, and their
attitude was, “S__t happens.” A few of them disembarked and found a tiny
clearing to play “pitch penny.” One man found a soft limb (a “switch”) and
began to weed-whack the area for the game.
Another man put on his earphones and entertained us dancing up the
aisle.
The rest of us laughed (at the beginning), talked, and read.
Since there was a hillside path, the men could
mountain-climb when they needed to pee. Not
so for the women!
With my luck, I was seated in the last row on the aisle in
front of the bathroom. The driver
informed us that he couldn’t start the engine, so we couldn’t flush. But some of the females began to get
desperate. The door knob to the toilet
wouldn’t turn properly and kept getting stuck, so I used a piece of paper towel
to keep the knob from turning and told the women I’d guard the door. Since there was no power from the engine, I
used my cell phone flashlight to usher them in and show them where the
necessities were located, although there was no flushing, of course. After a
bit, it began to get “ripe” in the bus, especially for those of us seated near
the toilet.
“Could you put on the emergency lights?” I asked the driver,
hoping that would provide enough power to flush.
“I don’t really want to use up whatever power’s left,” he
said. We ended up compromising with every third woman flushing. My job was to
open the door, usher the ladies in with my flashlight, and designate every
third person for a flush.
It was an interesting way to meet women! I was offered tips
and written recommendations, should I wish to pursue this as a new career.
.........................by Eileen Watson
