A New Year - New Expectations

The end of 2022 couldn't have come soon enough for Charley and me. After three healthy years during COVID mutations, five shots, hundreds of masks, and isolation from anyone suspected of carrying any virus, we succumbed between Christmas '22 and New Year's '23. The Christmas dinner we enjoyed resulted in three of us testing positive within days.

After hibernation in bed for several days,

with energy only to drag ourselves to the bathroom, a slow rise in our desire to eat or brush our teeth followed in succeeding days, during which we lost our fever, chills, swollen glands, sinus pains, and sore throats. We were among the fortunate who had no major respiratory issues and had doctors overseeing our care via teleconferences.

I love to make plans, to have a "to do" agenda each day. I thrive on goals and accomplishments, as small as they may be in retirement - experimenting with a new recipe, winning a tennis match, or outlining a new blog or book.

What's changed since our COVID experience? Everything!  I now look forward to a "palate-cleansing" year (NY Times, "Realistic Expectations for the Year Ahead" by Alyson Krueger, Jan. 8, 2022, Sunday Styles) - that is, one of calm and simplicity, with expectations in check.  I want to move on, while calmly processing each day. Let's face it - we were bombarded by a lot at once: COVID, flu, RSV, mass violence, war in Ukraine, recession, loss of loved ones, etc. Perhaps if I lower the bar on my expectations - for writing a new book, for extensive foreign travel - the risk of disappointment will lower, too. It's a self-defense mechanism in an attempt to simply BE.

My college roommate, a widow compromised with multiple health issues, experienced eight weeks of COVID symptoms in the fall of '22. On Christmas Eve Day she welcomed her son from California, who that night had to undergo an emergency orthoscopic appendectomy. He flew back to California in pain two days later, after which my friend's dog ingested a pack of sugar-free gum, which necessitated a stomach pump and multiple shots over several days.

The good news...everyone is back to good health!

So she and I are processing 2023 together, one day at a time. I will take my time submerging myself in the writing of a new book, whose topic will be the calm and enrichment found in the walks Charley and I have taken around the world.

I'll face the reality that awaits me every day, correct what I can, and accept what comes.

Welcome, 2023!

More Travel Photos

Reviewing photos for my book, A Survival Guide for People Who Travel Together: Tales from the Road.

Streetside barber shop, Soweto, Johannesburg, So. Africa

Zulu woman's headpiece, So. Africa

Thornybush Preserve, So. Africa

On the road to Machu Picchu, Peru

Trulli houses, Puglia, Italy

Ice Sculpture, Vermont

King of the island, Galapagos, Ecuador

Which is a statue and which is a mime? Dublin

Human statue, Park Guell, Barcelona

Lifeguard station, Barcelona 

Gaudi's mosaic ceiling, Park Guell, Barcelona

Art exhibit on footbridge, Paris

Foundation Louis Vuitton Museum, Paris

Class learning about Monet in Musee D'Orsay, Paris

Luxembourg Gardens, Paris

Lake Orta, Italy

Bonding in Naples harbor, Italy

 A granddaughter's selfie

Tree root sculpture, Dreher Park, West Palm Beach, Fl.

Universal Studios, Orlando, Florida

Conference Detox

I've just returned from three days at the annual Florida Writer's Conference in Lake Mary, Florida. There were over four hundred of us, each hoping to unlock the secrets for publishing a best-seller.  I have an entire journal of notes.

There were three sessions each morning, starting at 8 a.m.  For each session we had a choice of several presentations by writers, marketing experts, financial experts, lawyers, publishers, agents, or screen writers. Fortunately there was a mid-morning break for some liquid and a cookie, granola bar, or yogurt.  I chose the cookie.

There were three sessions each afternoon, again with a choice of several presentations or panel discussions. During my mid-afternoon break I chose an ice cream on a stick.

There was a dinner each of the two evenings I attended, with a keynote speaker or awards.  Having walked for thirty minutes before each dinner, I felt righteous and ate a dessert at each - the carrot cake and chocolate mousse.  I managed to waddle into my book signing for ELDERLY PARENTS WITH ALL THEIR MARBLES: A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE KIDS.

However, extra poundage wasn't the only thing I gained from this Conference.  The amount of information we gained was dizzying. Here are some of the presentations I attended:

"Sell Truckloads on Amazon"
"Change Your Characterizations through Syntax, Grammar, and Diction"
"What to Do and Not to Do in a Book Signing"
""Financials of Book Selling"
"Contracts and the Creative Process"
"How to Use Social Media to Sell Your Book"
"Using Writing Competitions to Advance Your Career"
"Book Trailers"
"Satisfying Endings."

With Margie Miklas
FWA Conference  Lake Mary, Fla.

In addition to seeing old friends from my critique group, I also made new friends - one in particular.  Her name is Margie Miklas, a recently-retired open-heart surgical nurse.  She won an award at the Conference for her memoir of travels through Italy (my favorite place in the world).  It's called MEMOIRS OF A SOLO TRAVELER: MY LOVE AFFAIR WITH ITALY, so check it out at www.margieinitaly.wordpress.com.

Now I've got to digest and absorb all the information. That goes for the food, too.

My Television Appearances

     For my first book, MINOR LEAGUE MOM: A MOTHER'S JOURNEY THROUGH THE RED SOX FARM TEAMS, my publicist got me a five-minute spot on Fox television in Providence, R.I.  It was a show called, "The Rhode Show," and featured locals with stories to tell.

     I agonized for weeks over what to wear and finally decided on a black dress with a red jacket.  I didn't want to disappear into the backdrop but I didn't want to be too flashy.  My necklace and earrings had to be visible but not overwhelming.  I decided on a string of black beads and black earrings.

     I had talked about the book for weeks in radio interviews and speeches, so the topic was no problem. Besides, the studio had been sent an advance copy.

     When I arrived thirty minutes early, I had to be buzzed into the locked studio.  I signed in and the News Director took me to a waiting room, where four others sat in plastic chairs.  She offered me donuts, coffee, or water and told me the order of our appearances.  I went to use the restroom.

     When the person before me was "on air," an intern led me past miles of wiring and props to the set. Behind a partition was a fake kitchen.  Well, the appliances, sink, and counter were real.  It was where the chef exhibited his talents during the cooking segment.  We walked through the pretend kitchen toward the set for "The Rhode Show."  The intern attached a tiny microphone to my lapel and told me to stand with her till the previous guest was finished.  During an advertisement, I took my position on the couch next to the show's hostess, while the previous guest scrambled off.  My book was propped on the coffee table in front of us. Lights glared down from the darkened exterior.  The intern was attaching a microphone to the guest that would follow me, in the same spot where I'd stood.

     The dynamic of having to respond with information and wit within seconds on live television is entirely different from being on the radio in the comfort of my living room or standing in front of an audience with notes.  I gave lots of information but my eyes bugged out.  My hands felt glued together on the side of my lap.  I made sure to keep my legs together.  My publicist told me I appeared stiff.  Although I nodded, smiled, and shook hands with the hostess, I hadn't been dynamic enough. "Television is a visual medium, after all!" the publicist said with an exclamation point in her voice.

     For my second book, ELDERLY PARENTS WITH ALL THEIR MARBLES: A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE KIDS, a new publicist got me a two-minute spot on ABC6 "Noon News" in Providence.  This time when I arrived thirty minutes before air-time, I'd gone to the bathroom first.  I wore the same red and black combination, but the red was a blouse and the black was a skirt.  As it turned out, I would be sitting behind a news desk.

     I was met by the News Director, who introduced me to the News Anchor named Matt. He had to be younger than my kids!  I handed him my book so he could look it over. The News Director escorted me to an 8x8' waiting room, where I sat alone for twenty-five minutes. No donuts, no coffee, only water.  Same plastic chairs.  Finally an intern brought me past a room with hair brushes and make-up (nobody was there, so guests were on their own!).  We continued past the darkened control room, where the News Director sat, and other tidy rooms to the news set.  I stood in the wings with the intern, till Matt motioned me into a swivel chair next to him behind the elongated desk.  "How much time left?" he asked the intern.

     "About thirty seconds," she said, fastening the microphone to my blouse and draping the wire behind my neck and down my back.

     '"Just look over there at the camera, unless you look at me," Matt said, giving a swipe of his arm to a vague area in complete darkness.

     We began.  I smiled at the cameras in every direction, since I didn't know where I was supposed to look. I smiled at Matt.  I used my hands and arms.  I picked up the book lying on the news desk, and gave lots of animated information.  I even flashed a sign I'd made about caregiving:  ASK FOR HELP!  I tried to be dynamic without spinning in the chair or dancing on the desk. The two minutes were over in a flash.

     I stepped off the news platform and the same intern disengaged my microphone. Matt mouthed a "Thank you" during an advertisement.  I waved good-bye and turned into the open office to retrieve my purse.

     "You smiled too much," my new publicist said.  "You looked unnatural.  And you were looking in different directions.  But you gave lots of good information. If you want me to market your book for nation-wide television audiences, you'll have to make a video trailer," she said.

     I'll put that on my blog when it's ready.  Meanwhile, the ABC6 segment is linked below.

www.abc6.com/story/26458647/noon-guest-author-pam-carey




   

   

Finally! A Publishing Date!

My parents, Ev and Walt

I am pleased to announce that ELDERLY PARENTS WITH ALL THEIR MARBLES: A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE KIDS will roll off the presses on June 20, 2014.  It will be available in paperback and all Ebook formats.  The book will be released on April 9th in Delray Beach, Florida, with limited advance copies or you can contact me and I'll ship one to you:  pamcharley@yahoo.com.

There will be a release party at the Acoaxet Club, Westport, Mass., on July 8th with unlimited quantities available.  I'll be speaking throughout New England this summer and fall and throughout Florida next winter and spring.

I'd love feedback on Amazon from those who read A SURVIVAL GUIDE.  I hope that at the very least a dialogue will begin between us "oldies" and our kids.

Thank you all for your support!
Pam