Self-Promotion in 2017

     Obviously an author has to do a lot of self-promotion.  He/she can write an award-winner or a self-published phenom (as with 50 Shades of Grey), but unless readers hear about it, who knows?  Of course, if an author has an agent and a publicist and a major publishing house, he'll have a lot of help doing the promotion.  Most authors don't ever reach that level, and even the big publishing houses expect the author to get out there and market himself.  The big houses have very small budgets for publicity in this era of downsizing and self-publishing.

     It's not an easy thing to put your name out there and splash your photo on the internet. Photo-ops for someone who didn't buy her first flip Razr phone until 2008 (me) didn't feel comfortable.

     After Minor League Mom:  A Mother's Journey through the Red Sox Farm Teams appeared in 2009, I spent a year speaking and doing interviews - almost all of which I arranged myself.  My publisher often set up the acoustics or introduced me, but didn't make the cold calls or underwrite the cost of food and drink at the book signings. I did.  In addition, I had to be comfortable speaking before an audience - or on radio or TV.  If I hadn't been, very few would have heard about my book. But I was a high school English teacher, and what I'd taught my students - public speaking - was easier than seeing my photo on posters or in social media.

     When Elderly Parents with All Their Marbles: A Survival Guide for the Kids appeared in 2014, at least I'd had some experience.  I spent another year speaking through doors that opened because of my first book. Signings and interviews followed, many of which were arranged by a publicist I paid.  She got me a second live television interview in Providence, R.I., but told me I was not "TV-worthy" for the big-time -  The Today Show.  I was not animated enough!  I promised to do everything but stand on the table and even brought a cardboard sign I used in the interview.  Although the topic was news-worthy (the "Oreo Generation," squeezed between taking care of kids and taking care of aging parents), I never made The Today Show!

     All of which leads me to the question:  Where do we draw the line between self-promotion and oversharing?

My Writers,Diners,Winers group at the book release party for Elderly Parents with All Their Marbles.

Book signing Boynton Beach, Fl., Public Library

Book signing Portsmouth, N.H., Public Library 

     We throw our lives into the black hole of the World Wide Web day in and day out, rummaging obsessively through the lives of others.  Don't misunderstand - an author has to have a web page, a blog, a Twitter account, a Facebook page, and selfies. They are necessary evils for any author today. But do we really care what restaurant our friend is in, what her dog is doing, or what song she's listening to?  My answer is, "No." Likewise, people do not care how wonderfully my granddaughter sings. The only exception may be the interest readers show in the books I recommend.

     A lot of social media is the old "look-at-me" thing.  Isn't my body, my croissant, my family, gorgeous (and better than yours)? Yet I have to believe there's more to "sharing" than that.  There's a joy in reconnecting and learning from each other.  The number of times I've gotten a "thank-you" for a post has encouraged this belief.  A picture still speaks a thousand words for those who haven't been in touch.

     Nevertheless, the act of capturing every move is often obsessive and offensive. We've all been in a restaurant when someone stands nearby while the waiter snaps away for a Facebook post. Or someone poses provocatively near us for a selfie, complete with a selfie-stick. There are those like my husband who mumble about the vapidity of self-promotion on social media. Yet he can't deny enjoying our friends' and relatives' posts when I (selectively) parade them before his eyeballs (he doesn't own a cell phone).  It seems the world is divided between those who can't keep their phones tucked away and those who are repelled.  I lie somewhere in the middle, finding it a necessary evil to sell my books. But believe me, I've had some publicity shots I'd rather forget!  Here are a few:

Looks like I needed some work on my roots!

Bug eyes and chicken neck

Was I asking for divine intervention?

     I recently read an article by Elisabeth Von Thurn Und Taxis (really!) on www.Vogue.com/living titled, "The Modern Woman's Guide to the Art of Self-Promotion."  Elisabeth listed tips for snapping and posting:

          1.  Know your place.  Be aware of where you are and whether your picture-snapping will offend.
          2.  Be judicious.  Ask yourself if you're uploading something funny, beautiful, or informative.  Your grandson's first steps and your new shoes may not interest the rest of the world.
          3.  Double-check.  Even with the best intentions, sarcasm may be misinterpreted, as may a provocative pose.
          4. Put your cell phone away and stay in the present moment.  The event you are enjoying may only happen once!  Don't edit or filter amid other guests to stop conversation or party-ing.
          5.  Don't put yourself in jeopardy.  Kim K. found out the cost of too much publicity.  Stay safe without posting personal information or risking your well-being. If you find yourself standing in traffic so the light can hit your face perfectly and the wind can fluff your brand new chiffon gown, you have a problem!

     Here you can see why I don't take selfies!

 






   

   

   

   

What Doesn't Happen When You Sign a Book Deal

This is my take on a blog by Addie Zierman, who appeared as a guest on Rachelle Gardner's Books and Such column.  Thanks, Addie, for your wisdom!

A writer spends years researching and writing, then rewriting a piece.  After three drafts he gives it to a Beta reader - maybe two or three.  He trusts these people - he knows them well - to make insightful suggestions about continuity, character development, time jumps, and voice.  He might or might not pay them.

The writer makes more changes.

Then he hires a line editor.  This editor is entirely objective, going over each comma and paragraph change, each verb tense and fact, with a magnifying glass.

The writer makes more changes.

He develops a query letter to a literary agent who specializes in his genre and is seeking new clients (maybe two a year).  The query might take months to develop.  It must have necessary elements but fit into one page. There may also be submission requirements for the agent, such as a proposal, which includes a marketing plan, chapter outlines, sample chapters, etc.  There go another few months.

The writer must have an agent in order to get published by one of the "big six" (or is it now five?). In order to get an agent, he must have sold a considerable amount of material.  And in order to sell a considerable amount of material, he usually needs an agent.  Ever heard of the book, Catch 22?

The writer submits his one-page query and waits...and waits.  An answer may take eight weeks to come back, if one comes back at all.  The response might be one line:  "We regret that your project is not suitable for our agency at this time."  For the lionhearted writer, this form of rejection can occur up to 100 times.  If he's lucky enough to get a response that reads, "We are interested in reading the first 50 (or 100) pages; please submit," he does so and waits...and waits. Usually with the same result, if he's a nobody.

But the writer hasn't been sitting around wringing his hands or relaxing with a cool one.  He's been developing a "platform."   The "platform" is crucial for a nonfiction writer, since he needs a following to be considered an "expert" in the field about which he's writing.  A "following" is loosely around 100,000 people subscribing to the writer's Twitter or Facebook account, blog, or website.  This assumes the writer is either a famous person or a national spokesperson.

In the case of fiction, a "following" can be garnered if the writer self-publishes and gathers 100,000 buyers on the internet.  Traditional publishers usually sit up and take notice, a la Shades of Gray.

While developing a "platform," the writer should be working on the second book in his series.  That's right...series!  The same genre, some of the same characters, same tone.  If  the writer is lucky enough to get a traditional publisher through a literary agent (who will take 15% after the writer has made back his advance from the publisher), he must produce a book a year.

One way or another the writer (wouldn't you agree by now he's a lunatic?) is determined to publish - through a traditional book deal, through self-publishing, through a vanity or a hybrid press (kicking in some money for formatting, design, and buy-back of the finished product).

Finally the miracle of birth!  The writer holds the newborn in his hands.  Euphoria overcomes him.  A book of his own!  It's wonderful - for about two minutes.

It means marketing, social media promotion, more editing, deadlines, accounting, and self-doubt.  He hides the negative reviews and goes on.  After all, he's a legitimate writer now, right?

What publication won't do is make him a celebrity if he sells the number he'd hoped, or a failure if he doesn't.  It won't change his insides, if he was broken before he bared his soul.

The writer is the same person who sat down at a blank computer screen and began the long journey to find the right words to convey his vision.  He may now be able to distill and inspire, but the world will take notice only for a second - or not.

What the world will do is continue to revolve around the moments away from the computer, the moments with the people who motivate and refresh him and inspire him to return to the blank screen.

Writing Dilemma

The manuscript I have been working on is approximately two-thirds complete. It is a memoir describing a daughter's caregiving during the final three months of each of my parents' previously healthy, independent lives in Florida. It is also a chronicle of the hilarious eccentricities of the elderly. By interspersing my memory bank of laughable moments with scenes from the hospital, rehab unit, and nursing homes, I am trying to recreate a scene that is too familiar to many.

My parents were in no way extraordinary. They did not abuse; they were not alcoholics or schizophrenics; they did not suffer from bi-polar disease or obesssive compulsion. They were loving, involved parents and devoted partners. However, my relationship with them shifted when they became dependent on me as their caregiver. Mine is the story of millions of sons and daughters who must balance their own very full lives with the daily concerns for their parents' survival and their own self-preservation. By creating a memory bank, I was able to deal with my parents' struggles and my own.

Here's the problem: this manuscript is not marketable. There are thousands of published works out there about caregiving of the elderly, as well as Alzheimer's Disease. A memoir, if it is to attract a publisher, must tell a very unique story. Should I go in another direction with this, or continue as planned?

If I decided to write this purely as a family history, I would finish the manuscript as originally planned and let the kids and grandkidc have a copy someday. But I am constantly asked for advice from friends who are undergoing the same stresses and concerns with their parents. I have concluded that balancing elderly care and a life of one's own is truly a common experience among the 50-and-60generation, simply because our parents are living longer.

So here's what I have decided to do. I am going to finish the original manuscript, although it is slow going, and then redirect it. The new working title will be something like, A HANDBOOK TO OUTLAST YOUR ELDERLY PARENTS. The HANDBOOK will provide tongue-in-cheek lessons based on the bizarre, laughable, memorable antics of my ninety-year-old parents. It will also provide tongue-in-cheek lessons based on my navigation through hospital surgeries, rehab facilities, nursing homes, health care agencies, parental alienation, and family rivalries. A HANDBOOK will provide levity while dealing with a demanding, stressful world that is neither black nor white, a world of laughter and tears. Suggestions???

Ripples of Connection

There's a quote from a memoir I read entitled TALES FROM THE BED by Jenifer Estess, as told to Valerie Estess. It goes like this: "It isn't what you know, but how you perform. Skills are the essential piece of the puzzle. They help you deliver the goods."

During the last year, I have been consumed with my book that was published in April, '09, entitled, MINOR LEAGUE MOM: A MOTHER'S JOURNEY THROUGH THE RED SOX FARM TEAMS. I thought I had "delivered the goods" by writing a unique story and a readable one, then finding a publisher interested in getting it on the market. Turns out that was only step one! Marketing the book became a full-time job - book signings, radio and tv appearances, etc., etc. All of which was new to me, fun, and certainly interesting. The marketing took on a life of its own (and overtook mine in the process) and proved to be another challenge in which I had to (and still am) "delivering the goods."

The impact of publishing a book cannot be imagined beforehand. In a previous blog, I described reconnecting with a former minor league player who was on the Red Sox with our two sons in the '90's. I had written about this player, who is now a Little League coach in Florida. He's coaching a kid whose mom had read my book and contacted us. We surprised the coach with a visit.

This past week more ripples surfaced. I heard from two of my former high school English students, both from Old Town, Maine. They had heard about the book and tracked me down on the internet. Their sentiments and compliments about turning them on to the written word in the classroom (and making them memorize Shakespeare!)touched me greatly after all these years. As I told them, a teacher can remember his/her failures in the classroom with great clarity, so it is hugely satisfying to learn of the successes, as well. I guess at some point during my teaching years I had "delivered the goods."

I sincerely hope the ripples continue, not only about the first book of mine, but about the next memoir that I am now starting. Let's hope I can "deliver the goods!"

HOMEWORK: Reading, 'Rithmetic, Then 'Riting

Like any other project, I cannot just dive right into it. It's the same with studying Italian or building a shed or learning to drive. There's homework that comes first to build up my skills and to learn how to structure the project.

My new project is writing another book. It will be about my parents, who lived into their nineties with healthy minds and bodies. The focus will be the funny, idiosyncratic things they did that made us laugh and remember them, before the caregiving started. That last part will have to be in there too, since the point of the book will be that I had a memory bank to draw from when the tables reversed themselves and things got rough.

I thought I was ready to begin writing. I have all the notes and journals I kept for those last years of their lives, right up until they passed away almost exactly one year apart. But I wasn't ready. I hadn't done all my homework.

I had not READ some of the books published about caring for elderly parents. Naturally, I don't intend to read them all, but at least some, that deal with the same subject about making difficult decisions with two remaining parents, then one. So I ordered a couple of them to see how they were structured and whether I had anything new to say. So far, my story and my viewpoint will be unique, as it should be. I am different, and so were my parents, from any of the other characters whose stories I have read. A publisher wants a new twist, even if it is an old story.

I had also not done the 'RITHMETIC necessary before starting this project. I had records from my previous publisher about the sales and expenses of my first book(MINOR LEAGUE MOM: A MOTHER'S JOURNEY THROUGH THE RED SOX FARM TEAMS, published by Barking Cat Books, a division of New River Press). I knew I had to sell virtually the entire first printing of that book before we broke even. We are well on the way.

But the preparation for writing involved creating a data base ('RITHMETIC) for the next book. I have now spent a month and a half putting lists together: names, addresses, emails of people who bought the book; names, addresses, emails of group members I have had the opportunity to speak before; contacts for bookstores, libraries, clubs, colleges, where I have appeared and where I hope to appear; invitation lists for book signings, etc., etc. There are over 1,000 listings so far.

Finally, when these homework steps are complete, I will begin 'RITING. 'RITING the first draft from the journals I kept will be fun. I anticipate that the storytelling will flow easily. After all, I knew the subjects intimately, since it will be a memoir. Revisions and redrafts will follow.

When the manuscript is complete, that's when the hard work really begins. Finding a publisher interested in the story is like finding a needle in a haystack. Only perseverance and luck will make it happen. And then comes the marketing, after I sign on the dotted line. That's when all the homework will pay off.